Why can't I find a weighted companion cube?

So I've been playing Portal... Like a lot and all I want on my desk next to my monitor is a weighted companion cube. Is that too much to ask? Well apparently it is, because the only licensed product from valve is a crappy plush or there's also a pretty neat papercraft version but that's not what I want. I want the real deal.

Yes, I've searched Ebay. No dice (dice, cube.. get it?).

So if you're a Dremel God and you are reading this, will you make one for me? I'm willing to pay.

Yesterday was a good day

That's right, I scored a Scout Trooper from Kotobukiya (list price $99.99) and a Stormtrooper Animated from Gentle Giant (list price $69.99) for $100 at the New York Comic Con. Life is good.

PS: I was agonizing for about an hour over a Kotobukiya Luke vs Vader Mc Quarrie for $110 but it's a huge piece and I don't think I had room anywhere to put it on display.